Don't Be the Straight Gay Best Friend

If you don't get this picture, congrats. You aren't a nerd.

So I had this "friend". 

She was beautiful and engaging and a ton of fun! I had the biggest crush on her. But let's just say that I acted in the capacity as her straight gay best friend. We did frozen yogurt, sung musicals in the car at full blast and talked about our dating lives. It was magical...

Until the wicked witch of realization fed me that poisoned apple of [gasp] reality. (The truth really is a stubborn thing.)

When it comes down to it, as I have mentioned before, in three years you will either be best friends or not talking. 

So to everyone that was in my situation: let's stop kidding ourselves. We have enough friends. We don't have time for trite chit-chat or pithy prattle (double 2 points). Either run for it or run from it. 

The real fairy tale ending isn't with some idolized embodiment of perfection (a.k.a. a sure-fire let down), but rather with your real "best friend". 

Sorry for the lecture, I just really wish we all thought we are as worth it as our future spouse will. 

"Mmmm. To Be Continued..."

Some things...just shouldn't be.

So I heard this amazing story and I needed to share. 

A man-who-shall-not-be-named and this girl, Susie Granger* went out on a first date. It went well...for her, I guess. 

So well, in fact, that at the door, she pulled in this guy and lays one on him. Then (5 minutes later) she pulls back, licks her lips, and says, "Mmmm. To be continued..." 

And she walks inside. 

She just walked inside. 

That was it. A first date, girl kisses, pulls away and says, "Mmmm. To be continued..."

Not.

Even.

Kidding.

Well he stood there for a few minutes alone on her doorstep then drove away with an unsure feeling in his...well, just an unsure feeling. 

I'm sure with a line that classic, he had to think of a few choice movies (Caddyshack 2, Blues Brothers 2000, Dumb and DumberER, Jaws: The Revenge, Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights, etc.) and realized that this cliff-hanger probably should NOT have a sequel. 

He never called her back.

So girls, it is okay to be a little forward (hence the 5 min), but just don't get crazy. 

p.s. I don't think this post will have a "to be continued..."

*not really her name. but it would have been funny to actually put her full name in. I laughed to myself then put in a full fake name. But feel bad without an explanation. So...ya.

HOW TO FLUNK A DATE -- GUEST BLOGGER: Proxee Consulting

So it has been a long time since I've posted. But boy, do i have a lot to talk about. So much so, in fact, that i need more time to decide how to approach it and had my friends over at the dating consulting group, Proxee Consulting, write a guest post. I also wrote one on their blog, check it out in the link below. It is called "The Formula of Love." Here is their great post on 3 ways to flunk a date.

Most dates don't lead to a happily-ever-after. Usually, this comes down to a matter of chemistry (or as Zack calls it: The Formula of Love). But sometimes, even dates with potential can go astray. How?


The Proxies Present....


How to Flunk A Date


1. Put yourself down.
We get it. Everyone has insecurities and dating can turn these into a mental list of "reasons why this person is too good for me". But would you ever go into a job interview and immediately tell them why you aren't qualified? No! You'd but your best foot forward and prove yourself in the performance.


The better option:
Take those insecurities and lock them in a box labeled "tenth date". Until then, your date probably doesn't need to know that you've flunked every science class you've ever taken or you have a sixth toe on your right foot. Instead, talk about the subjects you both feel passionate about. Confidence is attractive.


2. Be rude to anyone.
Everyone knows not to be rude to your date. You're trying to impress them, that's a given. Even being nice to the waiter/waitress should be pretty standard knowledge. We're extending this to include the people who aren't in your immediate vicinity. Your date doesn't know how you treat others yet and will be forming an opinion from everything you do. Being negative about others could lead to the unwanted assumptions that you are a negative person or someone who doesn't know how to let things go.


The better option:
Still angry at your ex? Estranged from your parents? Professor give you an "F" when you deserved better? Keep your mouth shut or your words neutral. Better yet, try to steer the conversation in a different direction.


3. Talk about yourself too much.
Focusing too much on yourself makes you look either nervous or conceited and will bore your date.


The better option:
Get to know your date by asking questions about them. Listen to their answers and respond to what they've said. Show an interest in them by being part of the conversation.


That's it! Three easy steps to take you from first date to "happily dating after."