Simple Advice to Guys and Girls - vlog#2

So this is pretty simple.

Guys, just do it. You think too much. You can imagine every way of getting rejected...or you can just go and find out the way she is going to do it.

Girls, realize that guys are just not thinking by trying to think too much. Help us be less dumb by loving us enough to tell us.

And again, special thanks to Emily and Devin for filming this. Subscribe to their dating YouTube channel!

Don't Get Serious, UNLESS...you want to get serious(?) - Guest Post by Bret Martineau

As my wife can attest, I love to analyze everything that happens in
life. Tonight's edition of "Bret Loves to Analyze" comes courtesy of,
and is directly influenced by, the hit show "The Big Bang Theory".
Great show, by the way. Definitely recommend it.

Tonight's rerun episode features Leonard and Penny, who, having been
in their relationship for a somewhat considerable amount of time, are
faced with the glaring relationship issue of "The Premature I Love
You". Basically, Leonard tells Penny that he loves her, she declines
to reciprocate, and classic sitcom drama-comedy ensues.

What am I getting at, you ask? Well I'll tell you. We, as a worldwide
society, have invented an extra step in romantic relationships called
the "Let's just have fun and not make this complicated" stage, which I
like to more accurately refer to as the "I want all the benefits of
being in a romantic relationship without any of the responsibility"
stage.

Allow me to demonstrate:

In the aforementioned episode, after Leonard tells Penny that he loves
her, she gets really upset and accuses him of moving too fast. Now, I
actually think that both Leonard and Penny act pretty immature in the
episode (lest you happen to see it and think I condone Leonard's
behavior), but this is what I'd say to Penny (or anyone in a similar
situation) if they were to come to me and vent about it: "What did you
expect?"

Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up:

There are two possible endings to any kind of romantically exclusive
relationship. First, and less desirable, break-up. Second, and
somewhat less desirable than the first option for today's
commitment-and-responsibility-phobic generation: love and babies.

You are absolutely kidding yourself if you think it's possible to move
past the friend zone without ending up with one if those two options.
It's in our biology to grow closer to the people that we pursue
romantically, even if we go into it with no intention of "taking it to
the next level".

So to be surprised and uncomfortable when your significant other
"drops the 'L' bomb" is borderline moronic in my opinion. Of course
you're going to fall in love! That's how it works!

My advice: if you aren't ready to fall in love and have babies, don't
get involved in romantic relationships. Date, yes, but don't get
serious until you're ready to get serious. Keep it platonic until
you're ready for it to be more than that.

Save yourself and your partners the heartache, and save the rest of us
the headache of having to deal with your second-hand drama.

The 3 Point Rule - Explained from a Hot Tub

So this is how it breaks down to know when to STOP trying to get with a girl.

• 1/2 point: Facebook post/message, @tweet/DM, etc. (you know...the stuff that can get lost very easily)
• 1 point: call, voicemail, text or email
• 2 points: call&voicemail or drop by
• 3 points: dropping something off for them

When you do those things to the girl, she gets the points. When she does them back, they are subtracted. 

The goal is to stay at 0. 

When she gets to 3 points....give up. 

RARELY do you meet a 4-point girl, but they do exist. 

Keep your dignity. Keep score....UNTIL, you have kissed two consecutive times, then there is no scoring...or I guess then there is scoring. ;)

And special thanks to Emily and Devin for filming this. Subscribe to their dating YouTube channel!

5 Remedies for Dating when you have CDO

What is CDO, you ask?

Well, it's like OCD--except the letters are in alphabetical order. (Full disclosure: that isn't my joke. but I thought it was funny....hey! Don't judge! I bet you I've heard a joke of yours that I KNEW wasn't yours and still didn't say anything...)

Now, if you are the kind of guy that has straightened picture frames in an Arby's before, you probably have a little bit of obsessive compulsive disorder. So what is the problem with this?

In business, in friendships, in family life, in chore duties, in personal hygiene, in problem solving...this is a blessing. You pay attention to details and ascribe meaning to them that will allow you to make split second (see Craig, I don't give myself points for EVERY alliteration) decisions with lengthy reasoning because subconsciously, you've already thought it all through.

BUT, if you are pursuing a girl...oy vey! 

Here is the issue: you think about the potential relationship over and over and over and try to figure out what to say and how to say it and when to call and what to text. Then, when you see the other person, you have been thinking about your communications, that you seem a bit odd and what you do say comes out more robotic than anything. 

So here are a 5 remedies I've discovered that are my proverbial Zolofts (FDA approved for fixing OC....ugh...CDO.):

1. Like other people. Have a few people that you are semi-interested in.
2. Before calling them, do an act of service. By the end, hopefully, you've forgotten.
3. Only text them out of the blue one in five times you think about texting them.
4. Set a limit on how many times you can talk to friends about them in a day. I try to make that 1 or 2.
5. Only look at their Facebook pictures once a week. EVEN IF a pic of her and another guy comes up in your newsfeed with some guy that is BLATANTLY less cool than you.

Remember, when you seem so weird around your love interest and act drastically differently around them than you do around their roommates, they begin to feel that you either don't like them, or like them too much. And even if they do like you, they probably don't feel the same way about you as you do about them, yet. You've been thinking about them 20 times a day--while maybe you were one passing thought to them. Be normal, as much as you have to fight it, until you give them a CHANCE to like you. Because honestly, deep down, you probably aren't in need of medication, but just understanding. It's not just about the art, but the framing as well.

So give them a good picture of you...but just make sure the frame isn't crooked.